Continued from Part One by Dr. Rob Rienow of Visionary Family Ministries
Mission #2: Welcome and integrate children into the full life of the church, beginning with the weekly worship service.
In the Scriptures we find a second method that God has prescribed for the discipleship of children. In both the Old and New Testaments we find children fully integrated into the life of the faith community, in particular in the corporate worship service.
Those of us in the children’s and youth ministry world frequently talk about the question, “Do kids belong in church?” I recently read a six page article on the subject, with both sides of the issue represented – those who thought that kids should not be in the service with their parents, and those who thought they should. The article was interesting, and many good points were made. There was one thing missing. Not a single Scripture was mentioned. Everyone’s case was made based on their opinion, experience, and what they hought would “work best.” I understand why the article was done this way. Ten years ago, I didn’t think that the Bible had anything to say on the subject. I thought that this was one of those ministry issues that we had to figure out for ourselves. That all changed when my Senior Pastor asked me to do a research project on this question. I was blown away. I found explicit Scriptures throughout the Old and New Testaments which demonstrated that children were intentionally included in the regular worship gathering of God’s people! I knew then that this issue was not up for grabs. Either we would follow the model of our culture which seeks to segregate children away from adults at every opportunity, or we would seek to build a Christian, Bible-driven culture where children would be integrated into our worship services.
The question is fundamentally theological. It is rooted in our conviction about the nature of the corporate worship service. What do we believe, at its nature, the weekly worship service truly is? Do we believe it is an adult education hour? If so, then get the kids out because they are distracting and the message is not tailored for them. Or, do we believe it is a gathering of the faith community in the presence of God and under the authority of the Word? If that is what we believe the worship service is, then do we consider our children a part of the faith community? If so, then that is where they belong. Or consider this question. If Jesus Himself were going to be the “guest preacher” this weekend at your church, where would you put the children? I have a hunch that you would have them in church that day. The point here is not to puff up your pastor, but what is the difference? The Word of God would be preached. Our pastors have been called by God to preach the truth of the Scriptures to the church, not just to the adults. One of the biggest mistakes I made in youth ministry is that I sought to win the hearts of the teens to the youth group. I wanted them to find their community and their spiritual home there…and I succeeded. I didn’t realize that when they graduated, they lost their “home,” and many then lost their faith. I should have made it my mission to first help them connect spiritually with their parents, and then to connect with the full faith community.
If you want to follow the biblical pattern on this issue and intentionally seek to welcome and integrate children into the worship service, you will be a counter-cultural church. There will be resistance from those who have become accustomed to the church structuring itself after the patterns of the world. Have you allowed the culture to drive this decision in your church, or have you sought God’s direction in the Scriptures?
Some churches seek to address this need with periodic “children/youth Sundays.” I think that these special Sundays where children or youth are invited send the wrong message: “This is a service for the adults, but from time to time you are welcome to come.” Is that the pattern we find in the Bible? Rather than set aside special Sundays to welcome children into the church, include them in regular and natural ways every week. Invite them to help with the ushering. Invite children to participate in the choir or worship team. Encourage your pastor to occasionally make specific application of the Scripture for that day to children who may be present. You will likely need to share with your church the biblical basis for why children are invited and included during your worship services. It may take a long time to build a Bible-driven, “pro-child” atmosphere in your church, but their souls are worth it.
So what do “tweens” need most for their spiritual growth? God has not left us to figure it out on our own. Most importantly, they need a spiritual connection with their parents – beginning with family worship in the home. Secondly, they need to be connected into the church – beginning with weekly worship with the church family. You have a great opportunity to provide these vital spiritual growth experiences for the children in your church. In addition, when the children in the church begin to receive their primary discipleship at home and through the church service, your children’s ministry will be increasingly freed up to pursue ministry with children who do not know Christ, and who do not have Christian parents.
Imagine the amazing things God could do through your ministry if your staff and volunteers dedicated themselves to praying, “God, please show us how we can do all in our power to equip parents to disciple their children at home through family worship, and how we can welcome, involve, and integrate children into the full life of our church!”
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